Supplemental Information

Adapted from "Thirty Methods of Influence" in Stephen R. Covey's Principle-Centered Leadership (New York: Simon & Schuster, pp. 119-128)
The full version of this piece is available at www.franklincovey.com/ez/library/thirty.html

"I submit that there are three basic categories of influence: 1) to model by examples (others see); 2) to build caring relationships (others feel); 3) to mentor by instruction (others hear)."

Example: Who You Are and How You Act

1. Refrain from saying the unkind or negative thing.
2. Exercise patience with others.
3. Distinguish between the person and the behavior or performance.
4. Perform anonymous service.
5. Choose the proactive response.
6. Keep the promises you make to others.
7. Focus on the circle of influence.
8. Live the law of love.

Relationship: Do you Understand and Care?

9. Assume the best of others.
10. Seek first to understand.
11. Reward open, honest expressions or questions.
12. Give an understanding response.
13. If offended, take the initiative.
14. Admit your mistakes, apologize, and ask for forgiveness.
15. Let arguments fly out open windows.
16. Go one on one.
17. Renew your commitment to things you have in common.
18. Be influenced by them first.
19. Accept the person and the situation.

Instructions: What You Tell Me

20. Prepare you mind and heart before you prepare your speech.
21. Avoid fight or flight--talk through differences.
22. Recognize and take time to teach.
23. Agree on the limits, rules, expectations, consequences.
24. Don't give up, and don't give in.
25. Be there at the crossroads.
26. Speak the languages of logic and emotion.
27. Delegate effectively.
28. Involve people in meaningful projects.
29. Train them in the law of the harvest.
30. Let natural consequences teach responsible behavior.